Barnaby 🐷 Joyce Befuddled on Bitumen
Bitumen pavement reclining, beer-swilling bush bogan Barnaby Joyce is a hypocrite. He is also a god-bothering cweepy chwistian cunt. According to some women he's always had ‘wandering hands’ but reads ‘a lot’ and his sons are ‘beautiful boys.’ But 🤔 what if this pissed pig 🐖 fucked your 👧 daughter or screwed your 👩 sister? 🤮
Parliament was supposed to sober up after the Brittany Higgins catastrophe and the ensuing Set the Standard report, but Barnaby and his colleague Perin Davey love a light refreshment, or 🍻 two, too much to change. 😆 This is despite most voters being happy to see pollies drug and alcohol tested.
Politicians absolutely look after themselves so no one will ever sign off on no 🍺 booze at work, but what other workplace tolerates alcohol on the job? Listen to this complete clown 🤡 spew his hypocrisy with Adelaide's finest reactionary racist ra-tard, Andrew ‘das dolt’ Bolt, about employee rights …
But Barnaby's the one who fell off a planter box (allegedly after mixing prescription drugs with a few 🥃 Bundies at the Australian Hotels Association work function, no less), while Davey turned up pissed, apparently, to senate 🍹 committee questions. While the booze culture 🥂 of parliament may have subsided overall, the junior partners of the C🪨al-ition very clearly see themselves as exempt — or maybe it's just that rural life and scones drives them to drink at their weekly workplace staff-building Tuesday tipples? 🍾
This surprised me; it’s not normal behaviour. The unfortunately monikered,
david👦🏻littleproud, Barbaby's boss.
But if a normal worker imbibes alcohol — let alone gets schindlers — at their place of employment they're usually sacked. But if you're a parliamentarian and 🥴 pissed — you're working hard for your New England constituents suffering cost-of-fucking-living pressures. Aha 😂 aha 🤪 aha 😝 aha 🤣 ha!
If I’d known I was being filmed, I’d have got up a lot quicker. Barnaby 🐷 Joyce, just a fuckwit.
When people go to an
erectionelection, they look for honesty and authenticity … What did Voltaire say? What was it? It's like what Voltaire said … It wasn't Voltaire, it was — I can't remember. Barnaby 🐷 Joyce, confused pretentious hypocrite bonk-banned buffoon.
A woman in my electorate has gone vegetarian because she can't afford meat. Barnaby 🐷 Joyce, nonsensical but defiant bush bogan.
If a woman in politics [or anywhere] behaved like Barnaby their career would be over. Dr Jenna 🙋♀️ Price, academic & author.
Never forget but, the C🪨al-ition tried to randomly drug test 5,000 new welfare recipients with failed PM Chairman Mal (Turnbull) claiming he was doing them a ‘favour’ (and that he didn't know the Cayman 🇰🇾 Islands was a tax haven). In support, Barnaby said housos couldn't go to work ‘smashed.’
When Warringah's Zali Steggall asked an increasingly out of touch Albo if he would introduce random drug 💊 and alcohol 🍷 testing for all parliamentary employees Albo dogged it big time — just like a typical South Sydney 🐇 Rabbitohs supporter! 🤣 He claimed tri-annual ballot 🗳️ box scrutiny was enough of a control mechanism (and has been too fucking busy hanging out with rich cunts). Again, recent surveys suggest voters think otherwise but.
Oh, and those reactionary dogrooters over at Advance claim that Barnaby is only hated on because he was a constant and faithful opponent of gay 🏳️🌈 marriage — but not of divorce! Aha 😂 aha 🤪 aha 😜 aha 😝 aha 🤣 ha!
I don’t take advice from people in Canberra. Barnaby 🐷 Joyce, channeling Sir Leslie Patterson.
A Terrible Timeline … 🫵
I’m a strong Catholic. I’m anti-abortion … and I’m going to be standing up for [but not practicing] conservative family values. Barnaby 🐷 Joyce, dishonest 🤥 reactionary dogrooting hypocrite.
2005: Barnaby invoked Kipling's If— in his maiden Senate speech, foreshadowing even more of the buffoonery to come … you'll be a Man, my son! Aha 😂 aha 🤪 aha 😜 aha 😝 aha 🤣 ha!
2006: Barnaby did not support the free provision of Gardasil (HPV vaccine) on the national immunisation program because it would promote promiscuity and the fight against that is far more important than saving lives. 😱
2011: Barnaby claimed his daughters would be adversely affected if same-sex marriage was allowed and spewed idiotic sexist falsehoods about the best protection for them being a secure relationship with a loving husband. Obviously, he wasn't talking about someone like himself! 🤪
2015: Barnaby again railed against same sex marriage, saying it could be seen as decadent by some Asian countries. 😆
2017: A WA Rural Woman of the Year Catherine Marriott said she'd made sexual harassment allegations against Barnaby but he didn't sue for defamation. An internal party investigation found insufficient evidence to proceed. 🧑⚖️
2018: Barnaby screwed his staffer (someone's daughter and someone's sister) leading to failed PM Chairman Mal Turnbull's parliamentary bonk ban. Yet Barnaby, like most cweepy chwistians, has always lectured others about how to behave. Our tip? … If his ex-staffer smokes around her children she is 💩.
2018: Barnaby lobbied against safe zones for abortion clinics — and for lucrative employment opportunities for his mistress ex-staffer. 🤑
2018: Barnaby really annoyed his ex-staffer's dad 🤯 and, presumably, his first wife's father was not too fucking happy either. 😱
2018: Barnaby implied during a paid interview that he may not be the biological father of one of his male children — an act which one female journalist said ‘exposed the basest depths of Barnaby 🐷 Joyce's character.’ 😨
2019: Barnaby whined as usual. What a dog who eats his own sheep. 🐏 🌭
2019: Barnaby needed a good scrub (bath 🛀 or 🚿 shower) for christmas. 🎅
2023: Barnaby keeps lying about climate change and renewable energy.
2023: Barnaby married his ex-staffer and while his ex-wife and his four daughters did not attend — a cohort of cweepy chwistians did but. 😦
2024: In response to Laura Tingle's objective observation that Australia is a racist country, Barnaby called the ABC ‘mad left-wing.’ Again, this critique from one of the most demonstrably dishonest, devoid of credibility or dignity, men to have ever lived. He dumbed things down even more by dropping ‘Dostoevsky’ into his remarks (having given up trying to remember Voltaire) and even a little française with ‘What's the lefty issue du jour today.’
2024: Barnaby channeled macho-man John Rambo saying voters should use ballot papers ‘like bullets’ while railing at an anti-wind turbine rally …
[Your] greatest weapon … [is to] turn up in numbers in Canberra and Sydney … And the bullet you have is that little piece of paper and it goes in that magazine called the voting box, and it’s coming up … Get ready to load that magazine … Go goodbye Chris, goodbye Stephen, goodbye Albo. Über-butch bush bogan Barnaby 🐷 Joyce.
2024: Barnaby claimed his homophobia is better than islamist homophobia.
To be continued … Aha 😂 aha 🤪 aha 😜 aha 😝 aha 🤣 ha!
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